Why Change is SO Hard

I am moving again. I hate moving. All I want is a home that I stay in for a long time, so I can just work on myself without turning my world upside down. Every time I move, I must re-learn my habits and routines. I fall out of flow and it takes me a few days to get back into it. It is so annoying! Change is hard because your mind has to reform the habits it already knows in a new environment. Change isn’t just about moving though. There are many different types of change. Such as: changing a habit, making healthier choices with food, starting a new workout or switching career paths.

You must start from a positive place when making a change. When using negative emotions like fear or guilt, you won’t really make a lasting change. I love the place that I live in right now. I am moving because I have bigger goals than to just live comfortably in a cute little home. The place that I am moving to will allow me to be closer to my family, which in turn will build a better relationship with them, and it’ll help me to afford the courses that I am planning on taking. Change sometimes deals with making sacrifices. I am sacrificing a home that I’ve fallen in love with, so that I can save money on rent and put it towards education. In the longer term, this will be the right move, but right now it kind of sucks lol.

Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

Usually when making a change we do it because we intuitively know it must be done. Quitting smoking, drinking heavy, eating too much junk food, being a couch potato or doing drugs become difficult habits to change because we’ve gotten so used to it. Once something has been normalized it’s really difficult to stop that behaviour. It takes small steps and a positive attitude to make a real, lasting change. That’s why they say take it a day at a time and don’t be too hard on yourself. Sometimes we make these impossible goals, like I’ll never drink again, but then you slip up and have a drink. You feel so guilty about this that you just become a heavy drinker once again because you think in your mind you have failed and may as well give up. This isn’t the correct attitude to have.

We all make mistakes and life is a journey. I used to be really hard on myself and consistently saw myself as a failure. Once I recognized that I wasn’t actually a failure, that there was no such thing as failing if you don’t stop trying, that’s when I was able to make the changes in my life that I wanted to see. Changing your habits is like reprogramming your mind. It takes time and it takes consistent effort. We all can’t have perfect days everyday. Challenges will occur and sticking to your goals will become difficult. You just can’t give up on yourself.

I had a terrible habit of drinking heavy and doing drugs every weekend over a year ago. I thought I would never be able to stop. It was like I was in this endless loop that kept repeating every week and it was making me miserable. The way I stopped that habit was by first changing my environment, so I wasn’t around the usual triggers that made me revert back to the habits I didn’t like about myself. Sometimes, when making change, you need to look at the people around you and ask yourself if they are a positive or negative influence on helping you reach your goals. In my case, I realized I needed to be alone in order to work on myself and create a healthier, happier me.

Photo by Akil Mazumder on Pexels.com

Now that I’ve spent time alone, I’m ready to be around people without being influenced by what they want of me. I’ve found my strength in doing what’s right for me and I’m actually proud of myself. I haven’t felt like this in a long time. So, if you’re looking to change something about yourself start small. If you want to eat better, start by eating one piece of fruit a day or switching your sugary drinks to just drinking water. If you want to start exercising more, start by going for a walk once a week. These small changes begin to add up and in no time, you’ll reach your desired goals.


Janice Lal

p.s. and remember, no matter what stage you are at in your journey,

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